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this summer

May 25th, 2008 (09:29 am)


O generation of the thoroughly smug
and thoroughly uncomfortable,
I have seen fishermen picnicking in the sun,
I have seen them with untidy families,
I have seen their smiles full of teeth
and heard ungainly laughter.
And I am happier than you are,
And they were happier than I am;
And the fish swim in the lake
and do not even own clothing.

-- Ezra Pound

i am moving to north carolina. woohoo!

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

November 16th, 2007 (07:09 pm)
current song: martha wainwright

smith is fanshmastic.
i have tons to say, but too much for here. i guess i thought i'd just sneak in a hello, and then list my classes because they are truly that amazing.
german 100
conversation for german 100
color theory in german cinema and landscape
fundamentals of music
writing for art history/ reading and writing poetry (i have to choose)
and then during january either a leadership program, or a french theatre class.

it is so beautiful here. also far too cold. golly.
i hope that there is a chance for some of you to visit me, and also for people i've met here to visit me at home. there's a girl in two of my classes right now who's going to be in ashland over christmas, and she might come up, which would be amazing.

i shall reiterate that i want you all to come see me.
come see me!

World Trade Federation [userpic]


June 8th, 2007 (09:10 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: le sad ouioui
current song: interpol-how are things on the west coast ish? fanshastic! only not.

come see me paddle!!!!! tomorrow! rose festival! i have to be there at 7:30 am, but we'll be paddling throughout the day! so cooooooome!!!!!!! if not for me, for those awesome boats!

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(no subject)

May 2nd, 2007 (10:35 pm)

somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond
any experience, your eyes have their silence:
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skillfully, mysteriously) her first rose

of if you wish to be close to me, i and
my life will shut very beautifully, suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility; whose texture
compels me with the colour of its countries
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens; only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody, not even the rain, has such small hands

e.e. cummings

World Trade Federation [userpic]

cause college rocks.

March 27th, 2007 (09:39 pm)

at this moment in time, i'm going to wellesley. that could change, but i'm feeling pretty awesome.
(the only other one i'm really considering is smith)

World Trade Federation [userpic]


January 8th, 2007 (03:57 pm)

current location: MY HOUSE!!!
yes, but how do you feeeel?: HOLY FUCKING GOD!!!
current song: MY SCREAMING!!!


um, so basically, i'm awesome enough that uw admitted me ages before they had to.

now just to wait to hear from honors...

my dad can shut up now.

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

December 25th, 2006 (09:40 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: determined

it's sad how much i want mail.
i really really want mail.
and to go do something.

darn people and their canceling of tea!!!

i now own ugly purple rainboots (which are growing on me by the minute), there's no place like home ruby slippers, and colorful, stripilicious underwear. it's very strange how well someone can appear to know you.

the ruby slippers are the highlight. i've been wearing them everywhere. not as dorothy, of course, but as the wicked witch of the east. i have the socks and everything.

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

December 1st, 2006 (10:48 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: satisfied

having applied to college feels very very nice.
(uw, and uw honors, check.)

AND! i've finished my extended essay. which i really don't want to edit.

World Trade Federation [userpic]

amazing ramblings because I don't want to forget.

November 18th, 2006 (08:36 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: thinking of arcadia
current song: Electricity, joni mitchell

the funny thing about my life right now is that lots of things appear to be going incredibly wrong, but i'm still having a magnificent time. i've been stood up twice (the third was due to a misunderstanding), gotten a ride home from my art history teacher, and i still have to finish my uw app by the deadline. BUT i've had two amazing dinners with maria, seen little miss sunshine (which was fantastic) and half applied to beloit.
i now own donnie darko. which i am in love with. it makes me really happy. and its song played while we were waiting for miss sunshine to start.
um, boys should call when they say they will.
and i feel like i'm not adequately describing the way i feel.
it's more than just happy. i've been genuinely enjoying myself. i ran into alan downtown, which was short, but good fun. i am in love with random coincidences, things that surprise you when they happen.
a lot of them have been happening lately. like when i visited smith college (which, by the way, is now my first choice. omygod. oh. and i mean this in the most amazing way possible. i hated it, and now it's everything i hope for.) i'd been at mount holyoke (which was AWFUL.) seeing as i hated it, it took (suddenly i feel as if i can't spell took...)less time than expected, so we ran by smith.
which is where the uh oh how wrong could i get holy fuck took place.
so, we drove into northampton, which was kind of amazing. and apparently they get music like portland, even though their radio sucks(how to save a life four times in two days. i almost thought i'd die. although i can sing along now...) and has all sorts of nifty shops, and reminds me of the towns on our coast. (i got the most amazing freudian slippers there. my feet stick out his mouth. putting your foot in it, ahar. i love them. oh hush.)
and that's when i started to feel whoopsish. then we drove up to the college, and in, and stopped by their theatre. the mount holyoke theatre is awful. it is worse than lincoln's. (which isn't bad, but i expect more from a college.) and the campus looked nice. more, uhhh.....ehhh.....can't feel this way. like when you start to feel attraction for someone you've always hated, and been very vocal about. which is basically what this was. exactly.
and then we got in the theatre, and. nice. and then i saw it. the sign. (an actual sign, although my mother, by this point, had been spending too much time with me, and got into a laughing fit over the punnage of sign vs sign, of which this kind of was both.) ARCADIA. for those who don't know, which is probably everybody, arcadia may just be my favorite play. and not for good reasons like it's well written or anything (although if the script had been bad, i'd have hated it.) but because of the whole tutor thing. as much as i hate to say it, romance makes me incredibly happy, and that play makes my cry. ish. gives me the same feeling as donnie darko, so maybe we're noticing a trend here.
but the big thing about this, was that i'd been looking for pictures of arcadia at the mount holyoke theatre. it's kind of what i look for, because it's the play i associate with good college theatre. (it's the only good thing i've seen at reed. where everyone in it was amazing. macbeth SUCKED.)
and then it was just beautiful
and later, in the hotel (maybe) i opened some of my halloween candy (starbursts), and both of them were pink. which is my favorite flavor ever. if you could word things that way.
so you see.
i have to go.
(the campus was beautiful and amzing and ohhh the people were nice and interesting and their boathouse is fantastic as are their houses. and i'm getting to be very good at paddling, which makes me happy.oh. the education is good too XD.)

and i'll do that thing i was tagged for later. maybe XD

World Trade Federation [userpic]

life is incredibly good

November 8th, 2006 (07:30 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: ecstatic, and amused.
current song: friends they are jewels, iron and wine

and the funny thing is, my mother thinks i'm happy because i ate.

(she thinks she reads me well.)

World Trade Federation [userpic]

in which certain pictures are taken and many things are realized

October 29th, 2006 (07:01 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: looking forward
current song: death cab, but, um, POSTAL SERVICE IS BETTERXD

because, basically, life is really good. many of the changes i wanted to, or hoped would come about have, or are, and i enjoy having definite possibilities.
the afore mentioned picturosityCollapse )
if you didn't look, you really should.

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

October 11th, 2006 (09:44 pm)
yes, but how do you feeeel?: silly, and yet, relieved

okay. now the world can start turning.

suddenly, things have gotten a lot better.
and maybe it'll mean more now. it kind of feels that way. that happens when you lose something and get it back.

and no. this is not in the slightest bit philosophical. i lost something i definately didn't need, and definately could have, and was about to, do without.
until i-quite randomly(i was struck by a moment of genious. was moving cds, and thought hey, mightas well)-looked inside my sixth grade planner.
and found
my clap your hands say yeah ticket.
why oh why there. je-heeez.
but i'm mildly amazed by my own randomosity. i'd never have looked there. ish.
which of course, means i win.
or fail
for losing it in the first place.
oh i'm so happy. now to finish hamlet...or at least act 2.

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

October 9th, 2006 (04:45 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: hopefullynotbackwhereistarted
current song: seeing other people, belle and sebastian

so, today i got on a bus randomly, hoping it would take me home. it did. stopped a house a way from mine.
it was more than kind of nice
did you know did you know did you know? bernadette peters is in the cartoon musical anastasia! things suddenly just got a lot cooler.
um, tea was good, except for spilling it all over myself. boy am i attractive. sheesh. was funny though. the last time i did something that bad, it got all over someone else. and there was a sort of correlation of circumstance.

planting was amazing. i'd say that all of you who didn't come missed out, but there's something about a group of three (four, if you count my mother) and things went really well. starting out, we had an issue of not knowing which plants were which. tess's mother had said that some weren't labeled, but i wasn't expecting half. anyway, we guessed, and got all but two right.
now, figuring out which were wrong was interesting.
we drove a long way to battleground. roundabout. at that rate, vancouver would have been faster (this was a search for wireless.)
then we spent fifteen minutes on google earth, and changed the background of my dad's computer. it is now a picture of my brother. it is blue, but still manages to look satanic.

planted all but two plants.
and then we had an incident.
SOMEONE got the bright idea to play cake loudly from the car. for three hours. around six, our battery went out, and...uh...well...the gate automatically closes at 7, soooo. yay for triple a. he asked if we'd left the lights on. my mother said...soemthing like that...
we had a nice cloud party.
k: (something along the lines of) the clouds look amazing. they look like you could just reach up and eat them.
e:(maybe) yeah, we could grab them
k:they'd taste like light marshamallow cotton candy
e:only they'd be tasteless!
t:once, my brother and i were at a restaurant and we told my parents we wanted juice. they said we could have cloud juice. then the ordered us water

e:in spanish, they don't use pronouns. yeah/ like go to the store. planted lots of plants today. was a lot of fun. should do it again sometime. glad came.
k:must find wireless. where money? hungry! ooooh...must make bagels after. will be good. 'lll eat lots. will spread cream cheese. and butter!
e:not like caveman!!!

yeah. when dropping pronouns, there develops a tendency to drop verbs and articles as well...and even the things that sound perfectly fine seem somehow simplistic.

laughed a little too hard.
i miss it.
spanish if funny.

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

October 6th, 2006 (08:20 pm)
current song: philosophy of loss

oh! also!
comment and...
1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me.
4. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
5. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
6. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
repost if you so choose!

and i'm going to be sloooooooooow.

and come to my gold! (if you can. or i shall be very sad and mellow come monday...unless that's an incentive XD in which case I WON'T. i'll have SO much energy from all the planting i've had to do by myself + tess and possibly my mother that, come zero period, my rambunctious fantasticalities will make YOU tired and force you closer to the other side of sleep. which hart, or jenkins, or curry will NOT appreciate.:P)

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

October 1st, 2006 (09:49 am)

my calendar still says it's the 21 of august.
yay october!

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

September 30th, 2006 (04:53 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: uncomfortable (my eyes itch)
current song: billy liar

i get the feeling i'm going to wake up REALLY sick tomorrow.

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

September 16th, 2006 (09:17 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: no one told me...
current song: some new song! though it's emily, and i'm not quite fond.

indigo girls have a new cd coming out...IN THREE DAYS.

World Trade Federation [userpic]


August 31st, 2006 (08:14 pm)

current location: heh. avec jack bauer! and kim, and michelle, and TONY!
yes, but how do you feeeel?: distressed

claudia has dead written all over her, and it's driving me crazy. persuasion is verr gut.
eta: yep. why is it that girlfriends and boyfriends in movies and on tv are expendable? (tank girl, anyone? james bond? captain kirk?!?!?) i, for one, am a fan of consistancy.
(claudia! if this were a soap opera, you wouldn't really be dead, regardless of the body... 24! i declare you soap!)
ack! now the tally is three!
just so you all know, kissing nina is GROSS.

World Trade Federation [userpic]

(no subject)

August 26th, 2006 (07:19 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: angry
current song: sheep go to heaven, goats go to hell

this health assignment is making me angry. it's asking me to determine my bmi, and a whole lot of other factors, and then to set goals for changing them. excuse me, but it's not healthy to, in a week, attempt to change your bmi and heart rate. not the sort of thing a health class should be encouraging.
i also printed my econ assignment on my dad's 'i kill you now' expensive dissertation paper. oops. tis a good thing he's out of town.
if anyone happens to have extra paper, and just so happened to be willing to part with it, i would be extremely grateful...

edit: oh! i forgot to say! if you ever want to talk to me, don't call me on my cellphone, as it is now my brother's. i'll say something if that ever changes. (it should, in a quarter, or so.)

World Trade Federation [userpic]

necessary schedule update

August 23rd, 2006 (08:16 pm)

yes, but how do you feeeel?: fairly apathetic. which is sad
current song: judy and the dream of horses.

0 IB Senior English Jenkins
1 IB French 9-10 Faust
3 IB Bio 3-4 Lapotin(this class should die)
4 IB Art History Irby (looking forward to it)
5 Calculus Vandervelde (der)
6 History of the Americas STRAUBE! (guess who got screwed.)

conclusion? i'll live.

oh. 10 pts to the person (other than tess) that can guess how many books i have.
comments AREN'T screened.